Celebrating 40 "D"-years and giving back

I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes on May 21, 1972. In a few short months I will be celebrating 40 years of living life with Type 1.

In honor of my upcoming 40th d-versary I've joined forces with a friend, Kathleen Ahern, who recently celebrated her Type 1 40th d-versary this past August. In recognition of our success in living 40 years with no limitations and no complications we are asking friends and family to make a donation to the Diabetes Institutes who educated us and helped us live successful lives. We're asking for a donation in any denomination of 40...$40, $140, $240...$400...$4,000. Our goal is to raise $40,000 to be donated to Joslin Diabetes Center in honor of me and to JDRF in honor of Kathleen.

If you click on the link on the "ChipIn" button you'll be directed to PayPal where you can make your donation. Then, please email me at erinarg@gmail.com to let me know where you would like Kathleen and I to apply your donation - Joslin and/or JDRF.

We can't thank you enough!

Questions, a light bulb and a sense of guilt.

Why don't I question myself?
Why don't I realize when something is really wrong?
Why do I try to believe I'm invincible at times?
Why do I let my blood run in the 200-300's and NOT question?
Why do I not realize that a pump change would be a wise idea?

I changed my pump Monday morning.
My sugars Monday and Tuesday were "normal"
... 74, 129, 79, 125 etc...
I ate Sushi for lunch on Tuesday.
I ALWAYS eat Sushi for lunch on Tuesday.
All of a sudden Tuesday night my blood shot up to 331.
What?
Okay, so I had a different style of Sushi on Tuesday.
I had a Rainbow Tiger Roll vs. the normal Tuna Avocado roll.
But, really? 331?
I did a corrective bolus and went to bed.
Problem solved, right?

I woke up Wednesday with a 255 fasting.
Wow.
BIG Bolus.
The day continued on... 141 (I see progress)
...164, 277, 336, 325, 276, 227...
You would think that at SOME point I would have decided a pump change was in order, right?
Well, I did think about it.
Seriously considered it actually.
But, by the evening I decided I'd bolused enough that I'd be down by morning.
Nope.
251 was my fasting number today.


Finally the light bulb goes on in my sugar-coated fuzzy brain!PUMP CHANGE!

In 40 minutes I went from 224 to 98.

Sometimes I really wish I'd listen to myself.
I knew I needed to change the pump.
I hate being over 200, much less anywhere near 300.
It happens.
It shouldn't happen.
But it can happen.

I tend to let the guilt in when I do things like this.
I did realize there was a problem yesterday.
I thought about going home at lunch to change the pump.
I considered changing it before the 7pm stamp camp when I was high at dinner.
I almost changed it before bed.

In the end, I spent ALL day Wednesday "High".
I taught a stamp camp class with a blood average of 300.
I got through it.
I felt crappy, but I got through it.
I think tonight's class will be much more successful
...and less stressful.

And, today I'm going to see my endo, Dr. Mary, for my 3-mth. visit.
I'll find out where my A1c is....
I'll have to share my pump failure story...

There are days when I really do not like being diabetic.
Today is one of them.

BUSY and a perfect 100!

I disappeared for 3 weeks.
I've been busy.
Many changes at our home.
Some good.
Some not-so-good.
Here are photos of a few...

We lost Sassy.
RIP baby girl.
June 1999 - May 5, 2011

May 21, 2011 I celebrated my 39th D-versary in NYC with a group of Type 1's.
Yes, I've been a Type 1 Diabetic for 39 years.
I find that hard to believe!

I'm taking an amazing course with Christy Tomlinson.
3 Hearts Workshop is such fun and so relaxing!
Love her style.
Love her sense of abandon!


Additionally...
We did an office-makeover-on-a-budget and I'M THRILLED!
We bought new sofas for the family room.
Ruby had surgery.
Like I said...I've been busy.

BUT, in the midst of all the chaos...
I did have one blood sugar that made me smile.
I get LOTS of "ish" numbers...125, 79, 129, 74, 203, 98, 62...
Numbers that are 50-ish, 100-ish or 200-ish.
BUT, I had a "100".
A PERFECT 100.
Love that!

The most AWESOME thing I ever did because of Diabetes was TRAVEL!

The most awesome thing I ever did because of Diabetes was travel.

My parents decided that it was best to teach my brother and I (both Type 1) that nothing would or could stand in our way. They chose to do this by showing us the world.

From the time we were infants we traveled, but the fun intensified in 1982. We spent every summer going somewhere "exotic".

These are just a few "highlights".
1982 - I turned 13 in Botswana. We traveled to Botswana, Kenya and South Africa for a month.
1984 - we went around the world in 55 days. Countless countries! I turned 15 in Rome, Italy.
1989 - Antarctica. We spent Christmas and New Year's in Antarctica.

I owe the world to my parents for showing it to us! You've made me a better, "more adaptable" person. Thank you mom and dad!

10 Things I HATE about Diabetes

The topic for today is Ten things I hate about you, Diabetes - Thursday 5/12

Having a positive attitude is important . . . but let’s face it, diabetes isn’t all sunshine and roses (or glitter and unicorns, for that matter). So today let’s vent by listing ten things about diabetes that we hate. Make them funny, make them sarcastic, make them serious, make them anything you want them to be!!



I spent the morning wondering what to write about. I do hate things about diabetes, but don't we all? Mine are not unusual. I tried and tried to write, but could not make sense of any of it.

I went home for lunch and created this:
Trying to get passionate about my anger I started with red dots. Red made me think of a bull...angry. As I created the layers... red dots, red leaves, black circles, eggplant circles, etc... I kept jotting down the "hates" on post-it notes imagining I would incorporate my notes as images into the piece, but I finally decided that the hate was right there on the post-it notes, so I added them into the piece.

The post it notes read:

10 Things I Hate About Diabetes
1. Rash from Tape
2. Gushers w/Pump Removal
3. Inconsistency
4. Fear you give my kids
5. Pump changes
6. Not being able to eat what I want when I want it!
7. Having to Bolus for coffee and normally forgetting!
8. All the extra baggage to travel or just go anywhere
9. You make me different and people don't understand!
10. The COST!

For the most part (90% of the time) I don't hate diabetes. I've learned to adapt to it, from it and for it. But, there are those moments where I do hate things about it. Glad I was able to get some of that anger onto paper today!

Thanks for looking!
Erin

Diabetes Bloopers... getting high and shootin' up!

Diabetes Bloopers for Day 3 of D-blog week.



Today’s topic is Diabetes Bloopers. Karen wrote: “Whether you or your loved one are newly diagnosed or have been dealing with diabetes for a while, you probably realize that things can (and will) go wrong. But sometimes the things that go wrong aren’t stressful - instead sometimes they are downright funny!”

I have to admit that my life with “D” is not funny. I take it quite seriously and do everything in my power to control it, but these are two stories that are funny to me…

“HIGH”

My son had a friend over one Saturday a few months back. They were in his room playing and I was busy cleaning the house, doing laundry, the normal “mommy” stuff.

The boys were getting loud and throwing things in his room so I went to the door and told them that they better settle down.

Being 12 my son did the whole “oh, Mom” (with that exasperated “YOU ARE SO NOT COOL, MOM” tone).

I screamed at them and told them I was serious. He looked at me and said “Mom, are you high?”

My son was referring to my blood sugar level.

My son later told me that when I left the room his friend said “dude, does your mom smoke pot?”

Shootin’ Up!

1987. I was out to dinner with some friends in the next town over. We were at a very fancy restaurant and I was wearing a BIG green Laura Ashley dress. These photos give an idea of what the dress looked like….

This is me in 1987 ... similar style dress, but on this particular night it was green like the one below:

The skirt of the dress I was wearing on this particular night was BIG!

Just before dinner my friend and I went into the restroom so I could inject my insulin (REG and NPH) with a syringe.

I was standing in front of the sink and had the BIG skirt hiked up and my leg exposed. I was about to shoot up when an elderly patron of the restaurant walked into the restroom just in time to see me standing there with my dress hiked up and the needle in my hand.

My friend burst out laughing as the woman turned and stormed out of the restroom.

A few moments later one of the wait staff came in “just to check” and we had to explain that I was diabetic and that everything was on the up and up. No, we were not doing drugs or “shooting up”. You see, that elderly woman had gone straight to the manager (a man) to complain that some young teen was in the restroom doing drugs. The manager sent a female waitress into the room to make sure he didn’t need to call the cops. Oh boy.

So, as I started... my life with diabetes is not normally funny. There are more moments that have been scary, frightening and just plain serious, but I guess it's good to find humor in some of it!

Day 2 of Diabetes Blog Week. Today's topic: Letter Writing Day.



Dear “D”-

I’ve contacted my lawyers and the divorce papers are in the mail. For the time being I’d like a trial separation.

Love,

Me

RESPONSE:

Dear Me-

We’ve been through this before.

I’m not leaving.

I love you.

You are my everything.

Without you, I’m nothing.

I will not sign the divorce papers. Ever. No trial separation. It’s you and me baby. Through the highs and lows. And, if you want a vacation…let’s go! But please do not forget the test strips.

Love,

“D”

NOTE: "D" and I've been through this before. I try to make him understand that I'm done with him, but "D" just won't leave so I've learned to adapt (MY D-WORD) and I continue on. He's in it for the long haul!

Admiring our differences in the DOC (Diabetes Online Community)

I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes May 21, 1972. My brother was diagnosed in June of 1974. We grew up learning about our diabetes together. There was no DOC (Diabetes Online Community). When we had a question, we’d go to our parents or our doctors. About 3 years ago there was one question that I didn’t think my brother or our parents would be able to answer without firsthand experience: “How do you hide an insulin pump in a dress?”

You see, I was going to a friend’s wedding and I couldn’t figure out where to hide my insulin pump in my dress. Granted, I’d been pumping for 10 years and had worn this particular dress once before, but I was unhappy with how I’d hidden the pump on that previous occasion. So, I googled “insulin pump hidden in dress” and found Kerri. Kerri of Six Until Me or S.U.M. Her blog was right there at the top of the list and in bold letters was insulin pump, hidden in my wedding dress (SCORE!):

I opened the blog and started to read. Then I read more. I clicked. I read. I clicked some more and before I knew it I had entered a world I never knew existed. There was a whole world of Diabetics, just like me, out there. I wanted to be a part of it all. So, I joined. I subscribed to follow Kerri. From Kerri’s blog I found TuDiabetes.org and I joined and then… I lurked. For the majority of the past 3 years I’ve been a lurker; I read. I blog hop. I “lurk”. In the past few months I’ve come to realize that my lifetime as a Type 1 has given me a lot to offer others. I have “lifetime experience” and while my experiences may differ from someone else’s I do know they just might help someone. So, I’ve decided to share.

Kerri has been my inspiration. It was HER blog that opened the doors to this world for me. She writes about her life with diabetes, but the main focus is just on life. She got married and told us about it. She got pregnant and shared the details. She now has a beautiful baby girl – Bsparl and she continues to write about life as a Type 1 living day-to-day as a wife, mom and diabetes advocate.

I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Kerri. We actually were at a dinner together just about 2 weeks ago, but I did not thank her. I liked to thank Kerri for being my inspiration.

Please note: I'm also greatly inspired by George! But, that's a whole other post. thank you ninjabetic!!!

Loss... affects Blood Sugars and Creativity

Loss. - n The act or an instance of losing.

Yesterday, May 5, 2011, I lost my cat, Sassy. Sassy joined my family in August 1999, after we bought her at the Fish Bowl Pet Shop on Hope Street. She was approximately 8 weeks old. We knew her birthday was in June, but we never did know the exact day. She was a beautiful cat. Loving. Interactive. Unassuming. Loyal. She always looked like a young kitten. She never got "fat" like most older cats. Up until 3 years ago people always assumed she WAS a kitten. Then, it all changed. She started vomiting. Profusely. And, her thin figure shrank even more. I took her to the vet and found out she had Hyperthyroidism. The vet diagnosed her before she even drew the blood. Bloodwork showed that her T-4 level was 19 and it should have been between 1.2-5.2 ug/dL. This article discusses hyperthyroidism in your cat.

Unfortunately, over the last 6 months we watched Sassy's health decline. I knew her internal organs were shutting down.
SYMPTOMS:
Appetite - Her appetite varied from EXTREME hunger (4 full cans of Friskies in a day) to loss of appetite (she wouldn't eat anything for 3 days).
Increased restlessness.
Poor hair coat. She no longer bathed and her entire coat was matted. The hair loss was extreme.
Increased drinking and urination. This got BAD.

The list goes on, but for the most part she showed signs of all of the symptoms on this website.

So, yesterday Alex and I took her to the vet and had her euthanized. It was not an easy decision, but I know it was the right one. My little Sassy-fras was suffering.

So, the day consisted of some VERY high blood sugars and NO creativity. None. The loss took over. I'm still battling high sugars today. I'm struggling to get under 200. My emotions are getting the better of me and I know this will take a few days to settle down. The bad thing is that the next 3 days are FULL! BUSY! I don't have time to be struggling with my blood. I have a First Communion and celebration to attend. I'm having my Mom, Dad and cousin over for dinner on Sunday to celebrate Mother's Day and I am selling my handmade gifts at the Shopping Night at my son's school on Monday night. Biggest problem here is that I don't have enough lovely handmade gifts to sell. Somehow I will get through it all. I'll get the house cleaned and the crafting done. I'll attend all events and somehow, throughout it all I'll mourn my Sassy-fras and I'll get my blood sugars back to 100-ish.

Happy Mother's Day to all!!!

Diabetes Blog Week

I'm participating in the 2nd Annual Diabetes Blog Week.

Karen at Bitter~Sweet is hosting this event which started last year. I'm anticipating some blog-hopping good fun!

Be sure to check out Karen's post about our first ever JDRF Adult Type 1 meet-up which took place last Thursday. It was so nice to meet new friends. Karen put it so well..."It was like one big party with a great group of friends, and it never for one minute felt like we had only met that night. I’m still always so amazed at how quickly the diabetes bond brings us together".

Big thanks to Karen, Joan, Rachel, Kathleen and Kady. I'm looking forward to the next one.